Post by Shikamaru on Sept 8, 2010 22:14:54 GMT -5
It’s crazy to think that I’m only a few months shy of playing and DMing here on NC for two years. In that time I’ve made a lot of good friends, some not so good and meet many new people from around the world. I’m not going to claim that everything was perfect, there was some of those that played here that given the chance at the time I would have strangled with my own hands but now looking back it was all for nothing. I’m not going to lie and say everything was perfect and the way I wanted things to be as a player or a DM. In the end there is nothing more ridiculous then holding a grudge or being mad at someone whose face you may likely never see or meet. To those that I’ve angered and upset and those that are angry still with me I have only one thing to really say and that is I’m sorry.
Though I’m posting this now on the forum of a “dead” server I still wanted to post something, something to close out that final chapter here on NC for me. Maybe a handful of you will only ever read this, and maybe some of you will pass it around to those that still have a blade prepped for my back but I don’t care anymore.
I wanted to DM here long ago to better the server for everyone, myself included. As a player you look up at the DMs and say “gimme”. Wanting something, be it tokens, or just a fun time in general and you only ever see your hand outstretched asking for help or wanting attention from a DM. As a DM you step back only to see nothing but hands and you have to work quickly and efficiently to give each and every person exactly what they want as quickly as “they” want it, not yourself. A DM can be an amazing story teller or a whiz with the DM console or widgets but if his players aren’t happy, they won’t have people wanting to play for them for long. After DMing table-top games for years ever since I was 14 to several years later resting three servers on my belt as a Player/DM to the more insane role of Player/DM/Admin you’re able to see things from the entire “table-top”. I look back now and laugh after digging through the forums on the DM boards on NC, the 19th post hidden away in the the DM boards Archive section from oh so long ago was my DM Application. And after reading the first portion of the application Dale had me fill out I remember the simpler days of NC for me.
“1. What you want to change on NC, how you would make that change, what it will improve, and the worst case scenario exploit that can be done by a player if you made that change.
_____
[As far as things I'd like to see change on NC there really isn't anything major enough to bring up. As things sit I'm happy with the server and the progression its taken over the time I've played here in the past few months. One thing I'd like to see a constant cycle of DMs on. On a previous server I dmed on, at peak hours we had two dms on doing minor rp, from passing merchants in the streets, to large scale rp. At the same time those that DM here also play here so its selfish to think a DM can be on ALL the time but if there are enough to take turns and still be able to play I believe it would be a win win situation. I love playing on the server but I would like to be able to throw my lot in and help flesh out our own world in the Naruto universe this server has spun off. We're not exactly following things letter by letter in the world of the show but thats the fun of it. Take a great idea, make it your own and expand on it, that to me is a true fan base and "fan worship" of a show.”
It’s funny to read that now looking back then, but at the same time many would also laugh uncontrollably at the following post by my former comrade in mischief DM Kankuro.
“He has experience and is pretty mellow, i think a chance couldn't hurt.”
I won’t lie but DMing and being an Admin on this server changed me over the course of the years, I became more stressed by trying to keep several players at once happy while trying to juggle RL issues that never seemed to give me a break. Now I look back and the only thing I regret is everything going out on such a low note. As I said I did this to make the server fun but quickly had a paddle forced upon me because other DMs didn’t want to be the “bad guys”. I did what I thought was necessary for the server but only built the reputation of the “asshole DM”. In the end I really don’t know what else to say but that, there came a point I just stopped defending myself because no one listens when you’re the one they hate.
Anyways on to the meaning of this post, I am letting those who still frequent here know that I will be stepping down as an Active DM and Admin. I will likely continue to poke my head in on a very rare occasion but as far as how things are done anymore I’m tired and I’m stepping down. Though I have done this in the past it was often with a upset tone. This time I’m serious, though Anko will likely not remove me for some time I wanted to let you, the last few, know. I have come to know many new people playing and running this server and in looking back I regret none of it except how things ended. I know some of you are not happy with me and others DMs and that is your right, but I ask that you not make issues out of it. That never gets anyone anywhere and on the rare occasion ends with the players ban and bitter DMs.
I will likely ghost around as I have been for the past month but I will not be taking an active role in running NC, if you need anything please ask Neji or Kiba, both have done an excellent job at keeping the lights on here at NC.
To the players I ask that if you continue to play on NC please keep in mind the DMs are human too and want to enjoy themselves and though yes without players there is no server the same goes for DMs.
To the DMs I ask that you keep doing what you’ve all been doing for so long and that’s making the players happy while trying your best to enjoy the “job” you took on as a DM when you stepped up to that line.
In sitting here typing this out I’ve had a song ringing through my ears that I heard earlier on the radio today that reminded me of the time I was helping one of my brother’s pack. He and his wife were getting ready to move across my state so he could go to school on a sudden whim and opportunity. Like many of our friends we were a part of an extremely “amateur” band playing and learning how to play at the same time. While moving his wife had stepped out to run errands and we sat down and started to play. A new Green Day song had just come out that year and we had been learning to play it, now its meaning cutting deep for both of us as we started to strum along and sing making complete fools of ourselves. When I say he was a brother he was actually a very close friend. We had grown up together and spent many of years hanging out and trying to avoid getting into trouble that always seemed to find us. That song was Good Riddance(Time of your life) by Green Day.
Looking back now at the chaos that has been NC for me I can honestly say that I enjoyed it. Though there were times I hated NC and didn’t want to play on it anymore there was also many good times too that still out weighted the rest. I’m sure some of you will be happy to see me go and to those I really have nothing to say and with no reason because there were points in time I gave many people reasons to hate me. To those that I will miss and miss now that have gone their own path already I say, Thank you for the times we shared. Naruto Chronicles will not be something easy for me to forget especially after playing for almost 2 years but least of all I will not forget her players. I wanted to leave you with the last part of my DM Application from so long ago and I wanted to share what I typed because still to this day I feel It stands true. Thank you and God speed.[/size][/b]
"5. Be a team player. Don't do this if you cannot take criticism and in turn dish it out with respect. You will not be the golden child all the time. You will have to stick to your guns when you are right and usually that will bite you in the tail! Believe me, I know. Smile However, if you can look forward to being here, enjoy your time "at work" and sleep well, then you are just what we want.
_____
I tend to have the same questions at the end of every PnP game I have dmed since i started which is "How was it? Did you guys enjoy yourself? Anything I can change?" Without being able to ask these questions and take the brutal truth of players you won't have players who will want to play under you as a DM. After all your doing it for them. "
Though I’m posting this now on the forum of a “dead” server I still wanted to post something, something to close out that final chapter here on NC for me. Maybe a handful of you will only ever read this, and maybe some of you will pass it around to those that still have a blade prepped for my back but I don’t care anymore.
I wanted to DM here long ago to better the server for everyone, myself included. As a player you look up at the DMs and say “gimme”. Wanting something, be it tokens, or just a fun time in general and you only ever see your hand outstretched asking for help or wanting attention from a DM. As a DM you step back only to see nothing but hands and you have to work quickly and efficiently to give each and every person exactly what they want as quickly as “they” want it, not yourself. A DM can be an amazing story teller or a whiz with the DM console or widgets but if his players aren’t happy, they won’t have people wanting to play for them for long. After DMing table-top games for years ever since I was 14 to several years later resting three servers on my belt as a Player/DM to the more insane role of Player/DM/Admin you’re able to see things from the entire “table-top”. I look back now and laugh after digging through the forums on the DM boards on NC, the 19th post hidden away in the the DM boards Archive section from oh so long ago was my DM Application. And after reading the first portion of the application Dale had me fill out I remember the simpler days of NC for me.
“1. What you want to change on NC, how you would make that change, what it will improve, and the worst case scenario exploit that can be done by a player if you made that change.
_____
[As far as things I'd like to see change on NC there really isn't anything major enough to bring up. As things sit I'm happy with the server and the progression its taken over the time I've played here in the past few months. One thing I'd like to see a constant cycle of DMs on. On a previous server I dmed on, at peak hours we had two dms on doing minor rp, from passing merchants in the streets, to large scale rp. At the same time those that DM here also play here so its selfish to think a DM can be on ALL the time but if there are enough to take turns and still be able to play I believe it would be a win win situation. I love playing on the server but I would like to be able to throw my lot in and help flesh out our own world in the Naruto universe this server has spun off. We're not exactly following things letter by letter in the world of the show but thats the fun of it. Take a great idea, make it your own and expand on it, that to me is a true fan base and "fan worship" of a show.”
It’s funny to read that now looking back then, but at the same time many would also laugh uncontrollably at the following post by my former comrade in mischief DM Kankuro.
“He has experience and is pretty mellow, i think a chance couldn't hurt.”
I won’t lie but DMing and being an Admin on this server changed me over the course of the years, I became more stressed by trying to keep several players at once happy while trying to juggle RL issues that never seemed to give me a break. Now I look back and the only thing I regret is everything going out on such a low note. As I said I did this to make the server fun but quickly had a paddle forced upon me because other DMs didn’t want to be the “bad guys”. I did what I thought was necessary for the server but only built the reputation of the “asshole DM”. In the end I really don’t know what else to say but that, there came a point I just stopped defending myself because no one listens when you’re the one they hate.
Anyways on to the meaning of this post, I am letting those who still frequent here know that I will be stepping down as an Active DM and Admin. I will likely continue to poke my head in on a very rare occasion but as far as how things are done anymore I’m tired and I’m stepping down. Though I have done this in the past it was often with a upset tone. This time I’m serious, though Anko will likely not remove me for some time I wanted to let you, the last few, know. I have come to know many new people playing and running this server and in looking back I regret none of it except how things ended. I know some of you are not happy with me and others DMs and that is your right, but I ask that you not make issues out of it. That never gets anyone anywhere and on the rare occasion ends with the players ban and bitter DMs.
I will likely ghost around as I have been for the past month but I will not be taking an active role in running NC, if you need anything please ask Neji or Kiba, both have done an excellent job at keeping the lights on here at NC.
To the players I ask that if you continue to play on NC please keep in mind the DMs are human too and want to enjoy themselves and though yes without players there is no server the same goes for DMs.
To the DMs I ask that you keep doing what you’ve all been doing for so long and that’s making the players happy while trying your best to enjoy the “job” you took on as a DM when you stepped up to that line.
In sitting here typing this out I’ve had a song ringing through my ears that I heard earlier on the radio today that reminded me of the time I was helping one of my brother’s pack. He and his wife were getting ready to move across my state so he could go to school on a sudden whim and opportunity. Like many of our friends we were a part of an extremely “amateur” band playing and learning how to play at the same time. While moving his wife had stepped out to run errands and we sat down and started to play. A new Green Day song had just come out that year and we had been learning to play it, now its meaning cutting deep for both of us as we started to strum along and sing making complete fools of ourselves. When I say he was a brother he was actually a very close friend. We had grown up together and spent many of years hanging out and trying to avoid getting into trouble that always seemed to find us. That song was Good Riddance(Time of your life) by Green Day.
Looking back now at the chaos that has been NC for me I can honestly say that I enjoyed it. Though there were times I hated NC and didn’t want to play on it anymore there was also many good times too that still out weighted the rest. I’m sure some of you will be happy to see me go and to those I really have nothing to say and with no reason because there were points in time I gave many people reasons to hate me. To those that I will miss and miss now that have gone their own path already I say, Thank you for the times we shared. Naruto Chronicles will not be something easy for me to forget especially after playing for almost 2 years but least of all I will not forget her players. I wanted to leave you with the last part of my DM Application from so long ago and I wanted to share what I typed because still to this day I feel It stands true. Thank you and God speed.[/size][/b]
"5. Be a team player. Don't do this if you cannot take criticism and in turn dish it out with respect. You will not be the golden child all the time. You will have to stick to your guns when you are right and usually that will bite you in the tail! Believe me, I know. Smile However, if you can look forward to being here, enjoy your time "at work" and sleep well, then you are just what we want.
_____
I tend to have the same questions at the end of every PnP game I have dmed since i started which is "How was it? Did you guys enjoy yourself? Anything I can change?" Without being able to ask these questions and take the brutal truth of players you won't have players who will want to play under you as a DM. After all your doing it for them. "
i was that one player who had no idea what he was doing:P and i remebere asking "Can anyone help me " and geting a response of " Dont do that in party chat. theres a Dm on and hes not all that nice. ill come show you a few things " 
